Thought bubble

I drove through a blizzard of styrofoam a week back. The freeway danced with the small white balls escaping from a nearby semi and cars yielded to their thick looming cloud. The sun was setting just beyond the hills of Covina as I made my long drive back home from work, the same I make 4-5 times a week. The 57 freeway, as usual, began to bunch up as the menacing drivers from the 10 merged into us with less than 3/4 of a mile to do so. I drove appreciating the sights here and there, trying to refrain from giving into my body's cruise control, which happens when you make the same drive every week. I prepared for school, yes work in the morning and school the rest of the afternoon and evening, congratulations to me being a full time college student with bills. My job is, not the best per say, but allows me to have over 18 units a semester while maintaining enough hours to pay financial aid. But, it was yesterday that I was able to really take a look into my future, not just daydreaming on the freeway, actually connect all I've been thinking with reality. For an advanced news reporting class we are put in "real life" news situations and expected to write a "reporter worthy" story. This weeks assignment was a press conference, sounds boring right? Well I though so too, until I actually got down there and rolled up my sleeves to do some reporting. Union Station was the site and transportation issues was the topic. A rally of unhappy transit and anti-pollution advocates more than kept my attention for two hours. From interviewing them to seeing their decorative signs I had more than enjoyed getting to know the "little people" of the situation. I then proceeded up the stairs of the LA Metro Headquarters and convinced one of the women at the desk to allow me to attend the invite only/closed press conference. Don't ask how, I have my ways. I took notes and left, speaking to a senator, several advocates, a few CEO's and with that my morning was complete. I could not believe the rush I had, not to mention the boost in confidence from the interviewees. But, that small fact is far from the point. The point is I actually enjoyed it, for so many individuals their career or job hardly excites them. While I still feed of the rush from Friday morning, others dread going to work, as I do now with my current job. It is knowing now that I am in the right field that gets me through the complaining customer, failed financial aid, worries of getting a job, etc. In one of my books for class the author talks about every writer needing to find their arrogance for through it they will achieve confidence and overall success in the writing field. Well, I found mine, and it feels refreshing and exciting, I'm just waiting to get out there in the world and begin. Let's just hope people don't start taking me as an arrogant B... it's confidence in disguise guys you should try and acquire some, it might be the deciding factor that lands you your dream job rather than just an outlet to pay bills.

Letting go

From when we are born we are expected to be something, someone, a figure in this massive world. No one ever is quick to admit it, but the fact remains the same. We are held to a standard, a standard we are issued by our family, religion or even over time ourselves. We look for commentary in our daily duties, a simple pat on the back or point of the finger to lead us in the direction one seems fit. Instead of listening to our own desires and passions we now paint our picture of life to attract the ones we look to for approval. But, how wonderful and innovative would Da Vinci's work be if he had created it for someone else? Or how inspirational would Thoreau's words be if he had written it for the American people of his time, for their approval? We are not to create for another, we are to create for ourselves, to voice our deepest thoughts and opinions. We must take all of the social rules and conformity's we have come to obtain over our life time and toss them aside. We must find who WE are and not who someone else wants us to be. We have passions, a creative self within us that was put there to do, not to sit by and mold into whatever the mood of the moment is. Take off the chains you have wrapped around yourself over time and freely create what it is you most desire, what makes you tick, think, what makes you be you. For so long I struggled with pleasing others, basing every action and thought I would make on their reaction. I even still battle with this from time to time today but have made it my goal to rid of this leech completely. How many hours have I wasted worrying when I could have been creating and more importantly, living?! How many others have done just the same and have failed to realize it? Life does not stop for us, for our decisions on whether we will get positive feed back on our choice of major, career, husband/wife etc. Life presses on without even a look at these things and so should we. Go abroad and live off the little money you make doing what you love. Get the experience you want, we sit by and see these movies or read these books that talk of people who live their dream and wish we could do the same. Stop wishing, go be your own protagonist and make your story the way you want it to be. Because in the end, all that matters is that you lived, not who praised you while living.

Paper thin

I sit here, early this Tuesday morning listening to my ihome and playing on my mac. Nothing about this seems odd or unfamiliar to me, and why should it? But, so many fail to have a life like this, a life where they can own these "gadgets" that have become as familiar as my own hand. To so many, a regular meal is something to look forward to, a roof over their head, a family who listens, or just someone who cares. But how can I, a college student in the suburbs of Southern California, come to give those people a taste of my life. I complain about financial aid not working my account out to register for spring classes and there are people dying as I pout. The worst part is that no matter how hard my brain works, how many wheels turn in my mind and sleepless nights I accumulate, life continues on without me helping one of those starving children. So what do we do? How can we get through this life and help those who need us. Do we join the Peace Corps? Send all our money to agencies who help those in need? Do they even help everyone? They cannot. It is impossible. Only a select few can benefit from your donation of thirty dollars a month. Then why do we do it? Why do we try to help the world when it seems like every step we take we are already eleven steps back and our advancement makes no dent in the travesties we set out to fix. It is an endless cycle that we continue to follow in hopes that we can somehow satisfy the call to a greater good. We cannot run a rut into the ground where we are tracking back and forth attempting to accomplish this. If we cannot aid directly than we must find another way. We need to find ourselves before we can aid others, create something within us, for us, and there you go, you have become more than just a walking jubilation of matter. In knowing this little more about life, about you, you have become open to the world, allowing people to become part of your life and you of theirs. This is how we can help someone, it isn't the money, the endless focus on attempt to change the future. We can become enlightened, allowing ourselves to just be, and in this we can be used in greater ways than our minds can fathom.

Trying to run back the clock

As a writer we are told, "not everyone is going to like your work" or "be prepared to get complaints". So I waited, and waited and the only complaint I got was someone disagreeing with a column I wrote and to be honest it only got my blood boiling for a bit. But it has finally happened, over three months of being out of school I have gotten a worthy complaint. It was about an article I wrote in early March and this individual had just now laid their eyes on it and were not too happy with what was written. I was charged with "distorting a quote", something a Journalist seldom to never does and in seeing this I was a bit confused. I sat back in my chair and thought about this particular article and the possible mistake that could have aroused. It was not until I saw the particular quote this person was appalled at did I remember what was said. I distinctly remembered this quote because it shocked even me to hear this persons "title" being bashed by their own quote. Naturally I put it in my story because that is what journalists do, we exploit the truth. And the saying the truth hurts has not rang more clearly than it has today. People think they can say what they wish, do what they want and get away with it without another soul noticing. Well I noticed and I think I might have given someone a heart attack in doing so. If you do not want something to be misinterpreted by another or in my case become a "distorted quote" then I suggest reading from a teleprompter or for the less accommodated, a piece of loose leaf paper. Because no one person is perfect and human error sadly to my "elite" and completely flawless complaining individual does exists. No matter what is changed in writing or taken back with words, this individual was thrown off their high horse and can never turn back good o'l father time. This person has made a flaw and their flaw was finally caught.

Where did So. California go??

Ever wake up in the morning and wonder where the mountains went? How do you feel when your out on the town or maybe on the run and you happen to look around you, down into the valley and you see a thick brown cloud? Well that cloud is not rain, fog, nope it is smog and I am not talking about that dragon from the Hobbit. I'm talking about the wonderful pollution that surrounds me daily. And the sad part is that it is not even all from CA. It is from China, India and many other coal burning countries.
Why is it every day there is a new coal plant being built in these countries? Why isn't any one stopping them? I mean if we know so much about global warming, and the future of our earth how come it is still continuing?
It saddens me that it is rare when I can see the beautiful mountain range, the deep valley and the outlines of my state. It used to be rare when I could not. I simply wish that we could go back to when the only thing we had to worry about was a sunburn. Not to worry about going outside too long because of bad air quality.

Ponzi Scheme....what next?

Here it is again everyone! Corporate America is stealing from the rich and poor to give to who?....THEMSELVES! Billions of dollars...BILLIONS simply was just re-directed to a bank in London? HOW???
How does this always happen? the simple sliding under the rug, knowing the whose who to get what you want. Well I am sick of it. I think that this entire situation is not news, it is an addition to history! For as long as there has been money, there has been scams. And I am sick of people pretending to think this is a surprise! They say government officials had no idea that this was going on and that oh if he hadn't slipped we would have never caught him. I bet the government did know, how could they not? They know when someone on a phone conversation says something relating to terror and if you check out a book that has to do with Islam in any way there is a background search being done on you immediately. So how can they say they did not know?
It is utterly ridiculous and I just wish people would come out and say hey we knew he was doing it but we did not do anything about it because in some way it was benefiting us. The only reason the government turned on him was probably because something pointing the finger at them was about to be up rooted and they had to quickly shine every light possible on Madoff.
Well I am sorry Bernie Madoff, it really is a terrible thing to be you right now, you just had your candy stolen from you by the big bully on the play ground and they threw it in the dirt.

Obama in IN

SOUTH BEND, Indiana (CNN) -- President Obama delved into the charged abortion debate in a controversial Notre Dame commencement address Sunday, urging civility and a search for common ground on one of the most divisive issues in American politics.Addressing a sharply divided audience at the storied Catholic university, Obama conceded that no matter how much Americans "may want to fudge it ... at some level the views of the two camps are irreconcilable."

"Each side will continue to make its case to the public with passion and conviction," he said. "But surely we can do so without reducing those with differing views to caricature."

The commencement ceremony was boycotted by a number of graduates dismayed by the university's decision both to tap Obama as its commencement speaker and to give him an honorary degree. The president is a supporter of abortion rights and federally-funded embryonic stem-cell research -- positions that are anathema to traditional Catholic teachings.

this excerpt was removed from CNN's website.

Many students were angry at Obama even being allowed to speak at the comencment ceremony in Notre Dame. It was said that many were arrested and numerous were booed and beaten. But why? Aren't they not allowed to express their 1st Amendement rights?

I can empathise with these catholic students who ae frustrated at President Obama being allowed to speak at their graduation. For me graduation is a day to remember all of the days you worked so hard; staying up late researching, writting paperes, going to school for days on end. And why would one want this day, a day of embracing accomplishments and being happy to be rained upon by a President they do not agree with? I think everyone should get off the backs of these students and allow them to feel angered, hurt, frustrated etc. Because it would be like you having to take your younger sibling out with you on your senior ditch day in highschool, or be forced to stay at home and watch your dog rather than go to Italy. Just try to see it at their level, get your nose out of the air. And maybe america and the President can stop looking down their nose at a situation and try to view it from the ground up.